dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
should my penis look like a turkey
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize
