I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
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