I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize