I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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