i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
