my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
