There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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