I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize