do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
