Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
