Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Randomize