I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
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