Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Randomize
