I think scott just propositioned me for sex
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
