You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize