Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
