My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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