Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
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