whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
