yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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