i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
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