Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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