I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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