I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
