This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
