I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
