she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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