i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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