then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
