nut hugger
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I have so many feelings about this burrito
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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