some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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