ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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