that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
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