I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
3 2 1 whiskey
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Randomize