i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
