I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
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