on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
