hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
from now on my penis is your penis
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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