He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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