I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
