If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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