dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
