: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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