This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize