He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
