Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
