Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
