Who wears a wallet chain?!
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Randomize
