Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
