The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
i think i just lost a toe
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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