she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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